Underbelly: A Show About Titties... I mean, A Tale of Two Cities...

 

Ok. The first week 'Underbelly: A Tale of Two Cities' was on, I didn't want to watch it. It was competing with 'Good News week' and 'Desperate Housewives', which I was already trying to watch simultaneously - no mean feat, and I'm a pretty good channel surfer. Also, I thought, IT DOESN"T EVEN HAVE VINCE COLOSIMO IN IT. How good can it be, if it's missing the number one 'gritty Australian crime drama' ingrediant?

But some strange force kept dragging me back to it, and in the end,  'Underbelly' completely seduced me. Being a mini-series, ( I mean 'an Australian TV event'), it has the appeal of a brief fling with an exotic stranger (with sideburns from the 70s), as opposed To GNW, who I kind of have an ongoing relationship with, and ok - sometimes take for granted a little. Desperate Housewives, in comparison, just looked pretty much like... well, desperate housewives. Even though Gabby has 'stacked it on', frumped up (it doesn't matter - her husband's blind), and had a bitch daughter - all very interesting developments - thanks Marc Cherry.

Anyhow, despite the 'stellar' cast, ("STELLAAAAAA!!"), being a mixed bag of Heelers, Daughters, Flying Doctors, Secret Lifers, Stingers, Home and Awayers, and even Sullivans, (No, don't killl John Sullivan! He's so nice!), the thing that I remember most about the first episode is Aussie Bob Trimbole's orange groves. Bountiful fruit above, no doubt richly fertilised by bits and pieces of ex-henchmen, and forgotten drug money. Weren't brown paper bags big in the 70's, btw? They are such a versatile item for the mobster on the go - being the container of choice for large sums of money, small body parts, and even sandwiches, at least, they were in those days. I don't know what the mobsters of today use - probably Tupperware, it's so much more environmentally friendly. But the oranges, reminiscent of a Cottees cordial ad, stood out to me the most - causing me to involuntarily whistle "My dad picks the fruit, that goes to Cottees, to make the cordial... that I like best!" for much of the show. A little incongruous to be cheerily whistling while dudes are being whacked on tv, but whatever. So to sum up episode 1 - Oranges.

Episode two - Kiwi Terry Clarke gets greedier, roots around a bit with a chick whose name I can't remember but whose rack I'll never forget (probably because it filled the screen for much of the episode), has a kid and turns into a bit of a psycho, (fair enough - these two things do often go together). Lots of whacking, and Terry takes this term quite literally, continuing to whack the dude to pieces after he's already killed him (he then goes home to his bit on the side, who thinks absolutely nothing of shagging him while he's still covered in blood. He probably then goes home to his 'legit' girlfriend, who probably thinks nothing at all of laundering his bloody shirt, being the good 70's chick that she was). And speaking of blood, Cottees are also probably getting a look in there, as TV blood is usually made up of chocolate topping with red food coloring in it. Yum!

But despite all the whacking and the polyester and the shagpile and every iconic 70's thing you can think of, the tits are the big winners here, with nubile young hippy chicks helpfully performing breast self-examination demonstrations for the viewers in the background of many of the scenes, particularly the club scenes, where they also kindly lather each other up in some sort of tub. Now that's kinship. I guess when the pimps in those days said their girls were 'clean', they really meant it!

Now I like boobies, and don't find them particularly offensive. They're functional, they're fun - hell, I even have some myself! And I have to admit to being a big mob show junkie, so I realise that it's neccesary to have topless bimbos writhing away in the background of every club, bar or kindergarten that mobsters hang out at, and cops have to attend 'to question a suspect'. That's just the law. But Underbelly has so many tit scenes, it's almost funny - to the extent that it damages it's credibitlity somewhat, (and yes - I would still say that if Vince Colosimo was on it). I also think the 8.30pm timeslot's a bit early - why the hell is Scrubs on at 10.30pm, and Underbelly at 8.30? This is a 9.30pm timeslot show, it has to be said. So to sum up epiode two - tits.

But overall I'm enjoying Underbelly, especially the rockin' 70's soundtrack, which includes Daddy Cool, Jo Jo Zep and The Falcons, and heaps of other good stuff. It's really taking me back. I'm sure there's plenty of topping yet to be spilt on the shagpile in coming episodes. And I'm sure that many others, (especially guys) are enjoying it also, for much the same reason as guys like to read Playboy - 'because they have great articles.' At the end of the series, it won't be the big hair, or the whacking, or the oranges, or the soundtrack we'll remember. It'll be 'So long, Underbelly. And thanks for the mammaries!'

 

 

 

Comments

[Angela]

hey Cath,
I was in the area (visiting Mia)so thought I'd drop by and check out your new pad.
Good on you!
Your comments are always funny and entertaining and definitely not short but I'm never tempted to skim over them.
Will pop in and see what you're up to sometimes.
Let us know when you are standing up in Brissie and I will come along and not heckle :)

[Elena]

what with the oranges and the boobs - sounds like Underbelly is a rounded sort of effort !! funny blog .

[gigdiary]

Nice blog, Cath, real nice! And pretty too! With lots of great content to trawl through.

cheers

[Cath]

Thanks Ange, and thanks gig - I'll try to keep it fresh with the funny stuff so we don't have to bicker!

[Jaz]

Hey Cath! I just noticed you have your own blog now.

Nice work! I'll be back..

[Kimbah]

Hi ya Cath, I've dropped by too! Have subscribed to your RSS feed so it'll be easier keeping up with your posts :-)

Thanks for the Underbelly rundown, as I haven't checked it out yet. Must remember for next week so I can have me some 70's flashbacks as well!

[Taryn]

Hey Cath, I will be droppin' in on you too. Love the Underbelly rundown, you're spot on. Consider yourself saved in bookmarks.
Taz

[Taryn]

And Cath, we talked about self care over at Mia's place, and where everyone was getting their spare time. Now coz your amusing I have to find even more time!! Farrrrrk. I solemnly swear I will NOT let my eyebrows look like Brooke's circa 1980's, nor will I let my legs look like my middle sons 2nd class teacher!!

[Cath]

Jaz, Kimbah, Taryn! So nice to see familiar names on my blog. I better keep it up now that people are reading it! Cath x

[Julie Vandermaat]

Hey Cath, You rock! What a pleasant surprise to check out your blog... Had me cackin' meself, you know how we used to cack ourselves in the seventies? I fully appreciate your television knowledge and your yumour. Jules

[Benita]

Hey Cath! Great to see you're up and running! Funny, I stumbled upon Gigdiary's blog the other day and wondered whether you had one...and you do! So now, between you, Mia, Gig, Facebook and Twittering, my career as a Domestic Engineer/Trophy Wife may be forced to take a backseat!!
As for the Underbelly stuff, I never watched the first series...It was on around the time that I had a newborn baby who didn't sleep. Nuff said. So I'm playing catch up a bit, trying to piece it all together; but I'm constantly getting distracted by the extremely large breasts that keep poking my eyes out. I'm watching it with my husband and I'm going "why are they showing boobies here? It's not really relevant to the storyline.." And my husband goes "who cares about the storyline? Look at the norks on that one"....I give up...xxxx

[Cath]

Hey Benita - that last comment's funnier than my whole post! Thanks for checking it out. x